"Brad, come down to the sales office please."
I dropped the hose and shot my rag into the bucket on the other side of the new 1985 Chevrolet IROC Z-28. Beautiful car. Brand new. I finished tearing all the new plastic out of it and prepared it for the showroom, but I still needed to dry the windows. I had a great job; I drove new cars, cleaned them, shuffled them around the dealership and ran errands for Sales and the owners hot daughter in Accounting; Sharon. Running the errands was my favorite and that was Sharon's voice over the loud speaker begging me to do something for her. The car would have to wait.
I ran into the makeshift bathroom in the back of the lot to "primp". The walls were two doors from a 1969 Camaro, propped up on pallets, the toilet a 5-gallon bucket with a leather wrapped steering wheel for a seat, the mirror a hubcap from a 1948 Dodge. I looked awesome. I ran to the showroom hoping it was a lunch run. I found Sharon standing at her desk, looking beautiful in a sun dress and heels and her 80's hair like a spinnaker. She looked awesome, too.
"Hiiii, Braaaaddddd."
I melted.
"Hello Sharon, you look nice today."
"Why thank you, that's nice of you. Listen, would you mind taking my car and picking lunch up at McDonald's for me and the guys?"
"Of course!"
She handed me the keys, her fingers glided across my palm. Yeah, I still remember it. Don't judge me, I was an 18 year old boy without a girlfriend, a stack of Playboy's at home and at work, and I played Dungeons and Dragons-- that was the closest thing to a hand job I'd have for years. Not counting my own hand of course. Anyway, the point is; she was hot and she let me drive her car, and she touched my hand!
She drove a 1984 white removable top Chevrolet Corvette with red interior. I thought I looked awesome in that hub cap a few minutes ago, but sitting in this car was going to make me look absolutely BAD-ASS! I pulled out my big rimmed mirror sunglasses and slid them on as I hopped in the car. Things didn't look right. The dash was bright but also a bit dark. I started the engine, adjusted my glasses and had to squint a bit as I pulled out of the lot. But, no matter, I could see fine, I was driving a Corvette with the top off and I looked freaking awesome! I bet I could get a chick with this car.
But things were going to change pretty quickly. I pulled into McDonald's, ordered the food at the drive-through, and pulled up to the window. I draped my right arm over the steering wheel to look cool and relaxed because the window girl was sexy and my age. She slid the window aside, I slowly glanced up at her. Her wide smile turned into a slight chuckle as I handed her the cash. She was into me. She brought back my sacks of food and I took each one with a smile. I was getting the nerve up to ask her out-- I must have had +10 Charisma at that point.
But I was too late! She quickly said goodbye and slid the window shut. Dammit! I couldn't let this go... I had the car, the look, she thought I was funny. I pulled the Corvette into one of the waiting lines and took a deep breath and opened the car door. I'm going to do this, I thought; I'm going to walk in there and ask her out. As I crossed the drive through lane, my left eye itched so I moved to scratch it but my finger went into my eye. I said "Ouch" and then realized why things looked a little weird to me. My cool-ass mirrored sunglasses only had one lens! The left one must have dropped out when I first hopped into the car. That's why she was laughing at me. I didn't look awesome at all, I looked like a complete tool.
I went back to the dealership, parked Sharon's car and gave her the keys and food. On my walk back to the car wash shed, I realized I should have gone in there anyway and asked her out. I could have made a joke out of it or laughed at myself. Either way, the worst she could have done was kicked me in the junk and told me no. But she might have said yes. Instead, I was back at work and feeling sorry for myself. The IROC was still a little wet and the windshield was riddled with water spots-- it looked completely stupid.
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